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Jensen was lying in bed trying to wade through Stephen King’s book ‘Duma Key’. Jared was in L.A. for a looping session for Friday the 13th. It was a long weekend and they had Monday off. Jared wanted Jensen to come to L.A. with him, but he was exhausted. The honest truth was he loved having the house all to himself. He missed being alone and well with Jared he was never alone. Harley and Sadie were curled up on the bed with him. Jared never let them on the bed, but he always did. They were like little heaters.
His cell phone rang on the bedside table. He checked the I.D. window and saw it was Eric. Why would Eric be calling on a Sunday evening? He sat up in bed. “Hi Eric.”
Eric’s voice was somber. “Hello Jensen.” There was such a long pause Jensen thought the call had been dropped. “I have bad news. Kim passed away this morning in L.A.”
Jensen was in shock. Everyone knew Kim had been hospitalized due to complications with lung cancer, but…… His voice wouldn’t work.
“Jensen?”
“I’m sorry. I don’t know what to say.” He wiped away the tears that were forming in his eyes.
“Where’s Jared?’
“He’s in L.A. for looping. Eric, let me call him.”
“Sure. I’ll call when I have the funeral details. All I know is they will bring him back to Vancouver.”
After the men said their good-byes, Jensen stared at his phone. How was he going to tell Jared, but he didn’t want him to hear it from anyone else. Maybe he should wait until Jared got home the next afternoon. No, Jared would be upset about Kim and angry if he heard it second hand. Jensen pressed the memory button for Jared’s cell.
“What’s up Smeckles?” Jared usual greeting for him. He sounded so happy to hear from Jensen. “Ahh, you miss me.”
“Hi Jared. Listen…..” Jensen’s mouth was dry.
“What’s wrong? Are the dogs alright?” His voice was panicked. Why else would Jensen call when he was going to be home the next day?
“No, no. The dogs are fine.” A deep breathe. “Eric just called me.
Kim passed away this morning.”
Silence.
A breathy sob.
SHIT! I knew this would happen. I should have waited until he was home, thought Jensen. Before he could say anything Jared spoke. “I thought…..” The tears clear in his voice.
“None of us knew how bad he was.”
“I need to….. I’ll see you tomorrow.” Jared sounded so upset.
“Call me if you need to talk.” With that Jared broke the connection. The two dogs sensed he was upset and moved closer to lay their heads on his chest and stomach offering comfort. He wished Jared were home to be comforted too.
Jensen woke the next morning exhausted. The dogs were still where they had fallen asleep. They gave him little doggie smiles. He kissed their stouts. Also he was willing to bet he wasn’t the only one who had to go to the bathroom. After letting the dogs out, Jensen turned on coffee maker and went to the bathroom. When he got back to the kitchen, Harley and Sadie were waiting for him at the back door. Usually they were indoors so much that when they were let out, it was worst than getting children to come in for dinner. They fought to stay out. But this morning they knew they were needed indoors.
He poured some food into their bowls and fixed a cup of coffee. Sitting alone at the kitchen table he thought of all the practical jokes he and Jared played on Kim, and he gave as good as he got. Jensen remembered how the crew laughed when water was dumped on him and Jared-laughed for days if he remembered correctly. Kim demanded the best from them and everyone on the show. And got it with encouragement and patience. He could still hear Kim’s “daddy voice”, as the script supervisor called it, when the shenanigans got out of hand, but always with an underlying touch of humor.
The cast and crew Christmas party was the last time they saw Kim. The illness had taken its toll, but Kim was so happy to be there. Hugged and talked to everyone like they were long lost cousins.
One month later he was gone.
It was only when he felt the cold touch of Harley’s nose against his arm, Jensen realized he had been crying. He took his glasses off and wiped his eyes. Jared should be awake and Jensen wanted to talk to him.
“Hi” The loud, rowdy Jared was replaced with quietness that Jensen had never heard before. It dawned on him that this was the first time they would see each other grieve.
“How are you doing?”
“I didn’t get much sleep last night.” Jared sound as exhausted as Jensen felt. “Will you still be able to pick me up at the airport?”
“Sure. The dogs will be happy to have you home.”
“Hug them for me. See you later.”
Jensen looked at the dogs. A little fresh air would do them all good.
Jared threw his arms around Jensen and hugged him like his life depended on it. They walked to baggage claim with their arms around each other, ignored all the looks. On the ride home Jared stared out the window. Jensen was becoming worried; he knew Jared was as upset as he was, thought the world of Kim, but he didn’t expect this reaction. He wanted to sit down over a beer and reminisce about Kim. He had the idea of a tribute to Kim for season four DVDs and wanted Jared’s input. The fans thought just as much of Kim and would enjoy seeing who the man really was and what he meant to everyone involved with Supernatural.
When they got home, Jared hugged the dogs and while he was in the kitchen getting them treats, he heard Jensen on his cell. Jensen came into the kitchen as Jared poured two glasses of whiskey. Jared rarely drank anything stronger than beer or wine. Jensen was the whiskey drinker.
“That was Eric with the funeral details. The show is shutting down for the day.” Jensen said as he took the glass from Jared. After hearing the details, Jared went upstairs to his room.
Neither one seemed hungry, so they did what they did most nights. It was everyman for himself. Jensen fixed a sandwich and went back to his room to try get through his book. Why did he pick such a thick book and frankly he couldn’t remember what he read after finishing a page. He was worried about Jared. Maybe he should go upstairs and make him talk.
As on cue, Jared knocked on his door. He had showered and changed into a t-shirt and pajama bottoms. The dogs were by his side. Jensen laid his book down and pulled the covers up. Jared slid in beside him while the dogs hopped up on the bed.
“I didn’t go to see him.” Jared said looking at the ceiling.
“What?”
Jared took a deep breath. “I didn’t go see him. I went out for a nice steak dinner with Gen. I went everywhere but the hospital.”
Jensen now understood why Jared was acting the way he was. “Jared don’t do this to yourself. You couldn’t have known he would die.”
“I should have gone to see him the first thing. I thought I would stop by this morning before I left for the airport.” The tears began to fall down his temples. “I just couldn’t stand to see how sick he was. Jensen, Kim was..is one of the best people I know.”
“Jared, look at me.” Jared turned to look at Jensen. “Kim knew how you felt about him. How we all felt about him. That is what he would want us to be thinking about right now. Not if we should have been at his deathbed. And he wasn’t alone when he died. His family was with him.”
Next thing he knew Jared was in his arms hugging him. He felt Jared’s body shake with the sobs. Finally after a long day, he was able to share his grief. They held each other and through the tears they talked and laughed about their days with Kim until they fell asleep with Harley on one side and Sadie on the other.
The End